Did I ever show you a picture of my latest tattoo? I got it back in late August/early September to celebrate the trip to New Zealand. It’s an earth from the view point of the southern hemisphere, with Latin underneath translating to, “prepared for all things“. It was an optimistic gift to myself that everything would turn out great.
I think it did 
Here we are! Safe & sound in LA! For the next couple days, Kyle & I will be staying with my friend Noel & his boyfriend Daniel. I can’t even begin to express how welcoming they have been, making us feel right at home. Noel is probably one of my favorite people EVER, though I rarely get to see him. Makes sense. He lives in LA, I lived on the east coast. Time after time, I promised to make a trip out to see his home and what life was like for him now. Alas something always came up that made it impossible to visit.
When the New Zealand plane tickets were being bought, we discovered that they stopped us over in LA. Of course we took that opportunity to spend time with Noelie. After four days of really getting to catch up, reminds me of why I love him so in the first place. He is probably one of the funnest warm hearted people in the world. Noel is just wonderful. What else can I say? If your ever in LA, find him and beg for his friendship!
I really like LA. The weather is beautiful, the sunsets are superb, and we have seen & done some fun things so far this week. Noel has a three day weekend, so I can only imagine what kind of trouble we’ll get into the next couple days.
This was the week! At last off Kyle and I went to begin our adventure. Monday morning Kyle’s dad generously took us to JFK Airport. It’s funny. Growing up, my Granny & Grandpa lived to close to it and literally every few minutes a plane would zoom by. Granny would always mention it and something along the lines of how great the airport was and so on. I envisioned it to be this huge overwhelming place that I obviously would immediately get lost at. But you know what, our trip to LA was extremely smooth.
Anyway, once Kyle & I got dropped off at JFK & checked-in, realized that we were STARVING. The first place we saw was a Panda Express (or something like that). Sure we thought, “Chinese sounds great at 11am.”
Kyle and I stepped into line and took a look at what they had to offer. Mmmmm basically all the favorites.
Looking up at the sign Kyle said, “let’s just get the Panda feast and split it. It’s a great price – $13 for two sides and three entrees. You can’t beat that!”
Sounds like a great deal right?
As we got closer to the cash register, turned out without wearing glasses, Kyle can’t see. It was actually $33 for HUGE portions. So there we were, with a mountain of food to feed a large family and $33 shorter than when we walked in.
In the end, we were happy for the meal. Airplanes rarely feed you during flights anymore and I assume we would have been miserably hungry as soon as the plane took off. I just thought it was funny that after consciously making the effort to save money, the first chance we had, got confused & spent way more than we planned on airport food of all things.
My mom loves talking to strangers. For as long as I can remember, anytime she went out would later come home with stories about the nicest woman/man/young adult she met on the bus/train/plane/line at A&P and how they had the loveliest conversation. In addition, these people always ended up being just like her, and together they would bask in the glow of similar interests.
I on the other hand rarely enjoy chatting with strangers. The weird thing is that it feels as though they make it a personal mission to find me and get the conversation going. And of course it’s always when I listening to my ipod or in the middle of a really good book. I feel bad, obviously giving off a “I do not want to talk” vibe, but man…sometimes a girl needs to be alone with her thoughts.
It got my thinking. In a world that is basically consisted of strangers, I’d rather give off something that makes me approachable. It’s nice to be the type of individual that people want to talk to. And these small conversations are, after all, the stories of life that help mix up an otherwise ladi dah seen-it-before day.
I decided that for now on, I will speak to one stranger a day. If they approach me, well that’s great! Then I don’t have to make the first move . The most important thing is be engaged while not mentally begging the person to leave me alone (which is usually the case?. Generally, I humor the alleged stranger a bit, while hinting that my book is obviously more important then them. Nope. Not anymore!
I officially began on Tuesday while riding down the elevator during lunch. The woman across the way was holding a book by one of my favorite authors, Philippa Gregory. Turns out if was Philippa’s newest & I didn’t even know about it’s existence! According to my elevator friend it is very good. How great is that? Later while Kyle & I waited in line to buy tickets for a movie, the man behind us started kidding around about this and that. At the end of the day, I was amazed how easy it was once I gave myself the push forward.
Wednesday & Thursday were a piece of cake. It basically consisted of business men making small talk with me while in the elevator, on the bus going to work, and at the coffee house Emily & I go to for our coffee breaks.
I want to approach my trip to New Zealand with a positive open mind and heart. The people you meet while away from home are those who you never forget. Looking back on vacations, faces appear that made my trips meaningful. We will be in New Zealand for a year and I want to talk to & meet as many people as possible. Pretty soon the only person I’ll know is Kyle. Talking with strangers now where I’m in a safe environment is a good exercise to get me into the habit of putting myself out there to genuinely say hello to the world.
One of the things I dislike to do the most in life is giving two weeks notice at a job. There is no un-awkward way of going about it. I have quit three jobs in my life and only one time was it peaceful and well expected.
After I graduated college, it took me about five months to find a job in New York. It wasn’t surprising. The only thing I had behind me was a college degree & waitressing experience. Fortunately, a trade interior design magazine took a chance on my inexperience and welcomed me to their team.
I was working at Siam (the Thai restaruant) five days a week at that point, but they knew it was only temporary. So when I told them I’d be leaving to work in the city, it was more of a hassle for them to cover my shifts than actually the idea of losing me. They knew I would be back eventually.
I worked at the trade magazine for about 7 months, but knew early on it wouldn’t be something permanent. The salary was very low, the health insurance plan was terrible, no 401(k), and I felt the publisher pushing me to become a sales person. Something I did NOT want to be. I began to look around for jobs, casually sending my resume here & there, til USA WEEKEND Magazine took interest and hired me as a Sales Assistant. Again with the sales I know. But at that point I had no idea what I wanted to do. At least I could make some more money.
Quitting there was the worst. When I told the Publisher, she sadly asked what happened. Why was I leaving? Wasn’t I happy working there? It broke my heart because it wasn’t business to her; she loved the magazine and couldn’t understand how I would just walk away from it. I told her that nothing happened. I was happy but a good opportunity came up. She sighed and that was that.
Yesterday morning I knew it had to be done. At 8:40 my manager came in. Good. I would give her 30 minutes to settle in.
At 9:10 I made my way to her office, taking deep breaths along the way. As I walked in, I said something like, “gotta minute”? I’m sure it was said super loud due to my heart pounding madly in my chest, making it impossible to hear myself speak.
At that point, she probably knew what was coming. I NEVER go in to chit chat or actually make any conversation. After letting her know I was giving my two weeks notice, there was a moment of silence.
“So where are you going?”
“New Zealand”
“OH, well that is sooo exciting! One of my friend’s & her family just traveled abroad for a year. They LOVED New Zealand! That is very exciting Kristine”!
A total rush of relief went through me. No hard feelings. I think the insult and feeling of abandonment come when you leave them for someone better. If I had told her that I was moving onto to another magazine or worse, a competitor, there would have been ZERO excitement. But the fact that I’m going on to something a little random and completely off the wall, it was easy to be positive about.
I’m done! At last! The beginning of August was tough. I felt walls coming around me as the idea of not getting the work visa loomed ahead, wondering if I’d be able to quit my job after all.
This week has been yes week! Yes to visa! Yes to quitting my job! So all there is left to do is enjoy the next month and go
For the past two weeks, I have been filled with anxiety on whether or not I would receive a work visa for New Zealand. Naturally. No visa = a new game plan, which I wasn’t too sure I wanted. No visa also meant no chance in settling for a bit. I would always have to be on the run.
WELL. Guess who greeted me at the front door last night:
My Work Visa!!!
Up until now, I was assuming I’d be an illegal alien. Turns out the Kiwis find me acceptable to work in their country! Hip Hurray!
In addition, they sent a pile of goodies to further my excitement:
Oh boy we are on our way!
After reading my sad depressing blog from yesterday, I feel the need to make up for it. Yes, I was sad yesterday; all day in fact. Not only was it devastating to think that my past actions could potentially have the power to end my trip, but the emotions of the actual DUI came back up to the surface. It was a dark time in my life and up until recently have finally cleared it away. Circumstances like this feel the same as the monthly surcharge I paid for three long years – to remember how serious the situation was and how easy it is to completely disrupt a life.
Today is a new day with a new outlook. My initial response was grim, but after I got through all the emotional stuff, realized that what I need to do is get all the paper work in correctly, making it clear that I am a great addition to their country. The past is out of my hands. There is nothing anyone can do anything to change it.
They say you live and learn. OH I’ve learned alright. Hopefully part of the learning process doesn’t include losing the adventure of a lifetime….Wish me luck
Last night I began to fill out my work visa for New Zealand. Each page completed filled me with joy, thinking about how quickly time has been moving along and that really, we’ll be there in no time.
Then I got to questions D1 – D2.
“Have you ever been convicted of a crime?”
In most cases, people automatically answer no. I did as well. But then, earlier today I got to thinking about a certain DUI that I had four years ago. Which is on my record. Which the New Zealand Embassy will see when they are determining whether or not I am a good quality character to allow in their land of peace. In a frantic mess, I called the program Kyle & I are going through to New Zealand to see what this all means.
The woman on the phone replied, “answer honestly, you need to get all paperwork regarding your case, stating you owe no money, and show any classes you may have taken”. “I have spoken to people with the same situation as you and in most cases it’s ok”.
Most cases. As in not all, but most.
Four years ago, I was a completely different person. Well I was me, but a me with a completely different way of thinking and seeing the world. I wasn’t considering my future self who may have wanted to do exciting fun things like travel and experience the world. My younger alter-ego must have assumed I’d be in the same place, content in doing the same thing.
My DUI has been a prison and the destroyer of any faith my family ever had in me. Still to this day, they can’t help but feel frightened when I drive at night. The fees were astronomical. And only up until this past DecemberI have been paying $87.24 each month for co-pays. When that final payment was made, I thought Mr. DUI could finally be put behind me. But it always sneaks up.
I have no plan b. I don’t want a plan b. I want to own my life, but sadly the DUI always will. My mom tried to reassure me with thoughts that many people in my age group have them & that it’s not so un-common. And that if I am meant to be in New Zealand, I will.
But what if they don’t want me? What will Kyle do? I’d want him to go still, but I don’t think he’d want to take our dream adventure alone. Once again I’ll be hurting the people closest to me. It’s a cycle it seems, never failing to take one more crack at breaking my heart and ruining everything.
And the worst t part of all is that it is ALL my fault. I turned the key. I drank and drive. And now I am possibly screwed. And then I’ll be starting from square one again.
Great. Just Great.
My brother just sent me this link: http://www.visionofhumanity.org/gpi/home.php
According to the Global Peace Index, New Zealand is the most peaceful place in the world! Hurray!
I can’t even tell you how happy I am to hear that. It’ll be a wonderful experience living in a country that has such a higher volume of peace. Not to say the US isn’t peaceful (ranked #83), but it’ll be a great change of pace
Having done the commuting lifestyle now for almost a month, I am finally beginning to get into the swing of things. Don’t get that confused with being fine, but I haven’t woken up startled to where I am or why I am up an hour earlier than usual lately. But…. the past two week have been very weird….it must be reality kicking in – I don’t live in Hoboken anymore. I live home with my parents. I pretty much rely on everyone in my life for transportation and help. I added an extra 2 hours to my day to commute. I want to be strong and initially walked into the situation like it was no big deal, just the next step to my goal, but man…it really affected me. I got extremely emotional (like crying on the bus for no reason), I have felt off with everyone, which lead to being upset that I have been terrible to people who are only trying to love and stand behind me. And the cycle repeated.
When I finally gave myself a moment to think and figure out what the problem is, I realized what I need – coping mechanisms to make the next few months of miserable commuting better and not take it out on my loved ones. Really, who’s not going to get sick of me complaining? I’ve already had enough of the negativity.
The first step I’ve taken is to seriously learn how to meditate. I have a quiet hour ride to and from work each day, why not take that time to practice meditation that will benefit the rest of my life? I’ve been working on it a little , but am going to need to consult my mom (who’s been meditating daily for most of her life) on some tricks on how to clear the mind, things to focus on, and so on.
Last night I went to yoga for the first time in god knows how long and my heart and soul NEEDED it desperately. I’m going to incorporate it into my routine every Wednesday (once a week is pretty much all I have time for and can afford). Plus my friend Meg is a yoga instructor, so I hopefully will do some work with her as well. Yoga is probably one the best gifts I’ve ever received. After the class was over, I got home last night feeling cleansed and fell asleep happy. This morning, the after yoga-math remained and I continued to smile for no reason and managed to make it to work without feeling anger towards slow walkers or thinking about the next wretched months ahead til I go to NZ.
